Studs, Tools, and the Family Jewels: Metaphors Men Live By Review

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Studs, Tools, and the Family Jewels: Metaphors Men Live By ReviewPeter F. Murphy's Studs, Tools, and the Family Jewels: Metaphors Men Live By, is a readable, provocative, and courageous book assessing one critical aspect of male discourse, the metaphors of masculinity which shape the way many men live their lives. What makes Murphy's book exceptional is that he goes beyond mere documentation of the widely-recognized fact that men's discourse involves many sexist and homophobic metaphors and commendably probes the influence these metaphors have in shaping the prevailing, albeit limited, view of manhood. In doing so, he addresses the usual suspects and includes discussions of metaphors such as "hard-on," "pecker," "family jewels," "jock," "blue balls," "faggot," and "pussy." This engaging book also features chapters on the use of these metaphors in most aspects of men's lives, including work, play, war, sports, humor and even in some males' revealing defensive defense of exclusive heterosexuality.
Murphy maintains these metaphors are often employed politically to distinguish privileged masculinity from its alleged inferiors, femininity and non-heterosexuality. He provocatively concludes that these metaphors while revealing much about men's relationships with women and non-heterosexual men, tell, ever so sadly, still more about the detachment, fear, distrust, and anxiety reflected in the desperate lives of many men. Murphy admirably seeks to mitigate the negative consequences of this phenomenon by offering an alternative version of the meaning of manhood, an alternative boldly calling, in part, for new metaphors by which men can be encouraged and influenced, by the language they use, to lead more humane, sensitive, fulfilled and fulfilling lives.
Not all readers will agree that dramatic changes in gender and male-to-male relationships will be fostered by Murphy's proffered revision of the many metaphors in male discourse. As Murphy is aware (see p. 5), he is likely dealing with a symptom of dysfunctional masculinity and not its primary or major cause. And yet, his response to that criticism is well- reasoned as he maintains that while language does not "determine" men's objectification of women (and homophobia, for that matter) "it describes it in a way that gives it legitimacy. How we talk about ourselves as men can alter the way we live as men."
Finally, some readers might find this book disturbing. Murphy throws down a dual challenge to males to both question their privileged status sustained by the continued use of traditional metaphors and to adopt a more "non-hard," tender and embracing discourse. Meeting the latter challenge must involve men willing to champion the use of new metaphors which might, in turn, make these non-traditional males easy preys, vulnerable and open to ridicule by those traditional males still trapped by the old metaphors underlying male dominance. Murphy boldly asks us to join him in meeting this challenge, noting:
"[I]n proposing alternative metaphors that are "unhard,' I open myself up to mockery. Men need to take these kinds of risks, however, risks that women in the feminist movement have been taking for decades (even centuries) as a way to confront what is touted as natural and normal. If men are to participate authentically in the struggle to change the way we think about masculinity and femininity, to move the discourse beyond the oppressive and the demeaning, we too must take some risks."
In the quest for saner and richer relationships between and among men and women, heterosexuals and homosexuals, all challenges calling us to that noble end are to be commended and that is decisively so regarding Murphy's challenge.
John Massaro
Professor of Politics, SUNY Postdam
SUNY Chancellor's Award for Excellence in Teaching, 1996Studs, Tools, and the Family Jewels: Metaphors Men Live By Overview

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